Family

A talk I was reading a while back, Hearts Knit Together by Gary E. Stevenson, prominently featured a story about a group of laboratory rabbits that were being used in a study to test the effects of a high fat diet on heart health. The study had produced some anomalous results. Most of the high fat diet eating rabbits developed heart problems, but some didn’t. When they investigated more fully, all these odds-defying rabbits were found to be under the care of the same postdoc who had recently joined the research team, Murina Levesque. While the rabbits in her care got the same unhealthy food as the rest of the bunnies, she also gave them affectionate cuddles, petting and soothing words that the other animals in the study did not get. It seemed that love made all the difference these rabbits.

I traced the story back to The Rabbit Effect by Kelli Harding, MD, which talks at length about the rabbit heart health study performed by Dr. Robert Nerem in the 1970s. The subtitle of the book, “Live Longer, Happier and Healthier with the Groundbreaking Science of Kindness” inspired an impulse purchase and I’ve spent the last bit reading through the book with highlighter in hand. Here are some of my notes.

• “We’ve learned to fly the air like birds. We’ve learned to swim the seas like fish. And yet, we haven’t learned to walk the Earth as brothers and sisters.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
• “Take a rabbit with an unhealthy lifestyle. Talk to it. Hold it. Give it affection. And many adverse effects of diet disappear. The relationship made a difference.”
• “There’s a social dimension to health that we’ve completely overlooked …” Hidden factors including love, friendship, dignity, purpose and even the designs of our cities, neighborhoods, schools and workplaces have a measurable effect on our health.
• Biopsychosocial model: “… a person’s health occurs in a social context that can’t be ignored.” What begins on the molecular level works its way through the organelle, cell, tissue, organs, nervous system, person and continues onward to two person relationships, family, community, culture, society and biosphere. Likewise, the reverse is true, our world, nation, community, family and personal relationships effect our bodies.
• “… the vast majority, 80 to 90 percent, of people’s health depends on factors outside of clinical care … the biggest contributor to health outcomes by far and powerful social, political, and environmental conditions.”
• “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” ~ Mother Teresa
• Epigenetics: Our genes can be influenced in their expression by outside forces. There is an amazing flexibility in life. “Methylation alters the cells narrative without changing the genetic code. Instead, it twists and turns the DNA story into a new, sometimes better or sometimes worst plot line.”
• Epigenetic research reveals that experience can be embedded in the genome and passed on to descendants. This can mean life or death to future generations.
• “Love or a famine or an ice storm doesn’t directly change a child’s DNA sequence, but epigenetic modifications allow for flexibility in adapting to an ever-changing world.”
• “… one key predictor or a successful, healthy, happy life: good relationships.”
• “Oxytocin is known as the ‘love hormone’ because it’s involved in bonding, empathy, and trust. It is released at childbirth and during breastfeeding, as well as when we hug, kiss, and snuggle.”
• “Oxytocin helps us feel calm, appreciated, and even sing more.”
• “… touch is vital for every living creature throughout life.”
• “Holding hands lowers blood pressure, heart rate, and cortisol.”
• People who get daily hugs were found to have a 32 percent less chance of getting sick when exposed to a cold virus, and huggers who did get sick had less severe symptoms and got better faster.
• The ideal hug length is somewhere between “six and twenty seconds.”
• “Your child will grow up to be a different person if you pay attention and lock eyes with them more. And if you don’t, you may be unconsciously reshaping their genetic scripts in ways that will affect your grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Suddenly it seems that email can wait.”
• “Our intimate, one-on-one bonds are the most important critical hidden factor in our health.”
• “Genetics don’t determine our destiny; we do.”
• ‘Tool Kit’ tips for one-on-one relationships include expressing love to family through words, food, a helping hand, hugs, hand-holding, smooches, and snuggles. Cuddle while reading together or watching shows. Offer a pat on the back, shoulder squeeze or high five when other expressions are uncomfortable. Lock eyes with your loved ones (challenge children to staring contests or mimic each other’s silly faces). Play cards or board games with each other. Have family night. Share photos or videos you’ve taken. Lighten up / be silly / smell the roses. Make / schedule the time.
• “… find activities that fill your heart with love so that you can share it with others … take time for yourself too.”
• Neighborhood relationships can have an impact on your health as well. Research suggests that famous Okinawan longevity has as much to do with social ties as diet. Social meals, birthday celebrations, anniversaries, gatherings for a common purpose, laughing together, participating in pop bands, karate groups, taking care of one another … all have an effect. “… public health research suggests that it isn’t the diet but the community in which the meals occur that makes all the difference.”
• Social isolation is a serious health threat. Prolonged loneliness is riskier to our health than “obesity, physical inactivity, high blood pressure, and bad cholesterol.” Obesity may increase our risk of early death by 30 percent, but loneliness increases it by 50 percent.
• “The data seems crystal clear: it’s time to take socializing as seriously as exercise, diet, and sleep. Study after study builds on a mounting pile of evidence that social support in our community is necessary for wellness. Laughter, warmth, respect, trust, caring and support are good for physical health.”
• “Volunteering, visiting Great-Aunt Polly, attending book clubs, every bit of positive connection helps. Belly laughs with friends correlate with improved heart health, circulation, and decreased pain perception.”
• “… seniors who participated in community activities, attended sporting events, went out to dinner with family or friends, or attended church had a 70 percent decreased risk of dementia.”
• “Studies show that a loving pet reduces blood pressure, heart disease, and stress.”
• ‘Tool Kit’ tips for social ties: Prepare and eat food together. Invite a friend or family over. Host a potluck. Nurture your friendships, celebrate their important moments and let them know you’re ‘just’ thinking about them. Plant new seeds by taking a class, joining a club or finding an interest group. Talk to your neighbors. Host a potluck, walking group, board game night, planting, book/clothes swap. Consider adopting a pet. If you’re doing an activity anyway … invite someone to do it with you.

The book goes on to have chapters on work, education, neighborhood, fairness and compassion … wrapping up by discussing the mind-body connection, collective heath and creating ripples with kindness. At times I felt the book was wandering far from the description on the cover, but Dr. Harding ties it all back together in the final chapters. Great read. Highly recommended.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.